That being said. And The Bachelor stuff.

Is it just me or does every other sentence on The Bachelor start with "That being said?"  I'm not sure why that is so annoying to me, but it is.  Maybe it's because I have a splitting headache that four extra strength Motrin won't even touch, and I'm a little cranky.

But wait.  More importantly, I'm pretty sure that I just outed myself as a Bachelor watcher.


Apparently I did.  And since I've already gone there, I may as well just keep on going.  So who picked Ben anyway?  I thought I liked him maybe a little.  I was iffy.  But as each week goes by I rethink that thought.  And his hair is on my last nerve.  I guess he has a couple of cool things going for him, he's tall, can play some mean David Gray on the piano, is a business owner... but I don't know - I think he's kind of a snore.  Not that everyone has to be "on" constantly, but just, I don't know, entertain me.  Entertain me with more than just make-out after make-out with every single girl there, back to back.  


I get that he has to test the chemistry, but sheesh, that is so rude!  He literally still has a lipstick smudge on his lip from one girl while he is face in hand kissing another girl.  Besides making out with two girls in the space of like 27 seconds, his face in hand kissing technique is very offensive to me.  Just kiss the girl!  Why do you have to be handling her face at the same time?  Like petting her face?  Ugh.  You know who was the worst Bachelor offender of that kissing technique?  The Seattle guy, Jason I think his name was.  Oh my word I almost had to stop watching that season because I couldn't take it anymore.


Well, I'm sure Ben's entertaining himself with all of that kissing.


Speaking of that, do you ever wonder what kind of contract these guys have to sign?  Like, what happens if you know, things get a little heated with all of that kissing beautiful people stuff?  Is there a cut off?  Like, does a guy step in and say, uh OK guys, settle down?  I wonder what the cutter offer guy's job title would be.  Ooh.  I know.  The C Blocker.  


Producer, Script Writer, Host, Sound Guy, C Blocker.  Job description:  the opposite of a Fluffer.


Sorry, I'm not saying the c word* out loud in print.  It looks too crude.  I'll just say it to your face.  Nah, probably I wouldn't say it to your face.  Not in mixed company anyway.  There are only a few swear words that are tougher to roll off of my tongue, and that's one of them.  I mean, I'll say it.  It just doesn't roll smoothly and effortlessly, like other swear words do.


Wow, there is a lot of jacked up emotion on that show.  In real life, do girls really cry like that over a guy that they barely know?  They are sobbing under the covers and hiding in corners and professing their love for this person, and I would venture a guess that they don't even know his middle name.  I'm sure they don't even know his Mom's name, or like, his favorite flavor of ice cream, or how he takes his whiskey.  Or if he even likes whiskey.


And yet here I sit, thinking about next week's episode and the skinny dipping that will be going on with the bitchy model.  Woo, beware of tons more jacked up emotion.  Those other girls are going to lose it. 


I'm embarrassed to say that I can't wait.




* The c word = ______ a-doodle-doo. Blank-a-doodle-doo.  Get it now?