So I am into begging for friends now, apparently. The thing is, I have been hovering at 96 follows for so long, it's turned into a mockery. Why can't a few more people just want to be my friend??
I'll even accept a few more people to be followers that don't necessarily want to be my friend, people who plan to never read one post. That's how bad I want to hit triple digits.
Why do I care, you ask? I don't know. I don't know! I am kind of reminded about that time when I was sixteen and I weighed 102 pounds (omfg) and all I wanted was to weigh 99. That's actually a rather fucked up thing to admit to the entire blogosphere, but it's the truth man. All I wanted was to lose those stupid three pounds. Much like these days, except multiply that number by like 11. Yeah. Don't make me say it out loud, we all know you can do the math. And if you can't, just use a calculator dumbass.
ANY way, do I sound cranky?
I think I am. Maybe that's why those pesky four followers won't follow me. I guess I better change my mood. Or maybe not call people who can't do simple math dumbasses.
What if I sweeten the deal? I mean, I could probably mail the 100th follower a $5 gift card to Target! Woohoo! Because I have one of those things, and I always seem to forget to use it. And if it helps me in bribing a few people to follow me, I'm all for it.
But what about the other loyal followers? I wish I had even better than a gift card to Target for some of the great people that I have virtually met through this blogging thing. Really, I do. Thanks guys, those of you who still hang around and read my goofy ramblings.
I appreciate you.