Wednesday, September 12, 2012

text conversations I have with my husband v1

disclaimer: If you've never seen Anchorman (The Legend of Ron Burgundy), this exchange will most definitely be very confusing to you.  

Me:  Where are you?  You said you were just leaving.

Husband:  I am a man.  Doing man things.

Me:  OK Ron Burgundy, should I expect you any time soon?

Husband:  Can you pick me up.  I'm too old for Man Day.  Those growlers were strong and I may or may not be drunk.

Me:  When in Rome...

Husband:  Yes, go on.

Me:  If I recall correctly, Ron Burgundy walks home.

Husband:  I don't know how to put this, but I'm kind of a big deal.   I'm very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany. 

Me:  Why don't you try that new fad, jogging.  I believe it's jogging or yogging.  It might be a soft j.

Husband:  But I'm in a glass case of emotion!

Me:  Son of a bee-sting.  

Me: Fine, I'll be there in a minute.  You better be ready because I am not waiting on your drunk ass.

Husband:  When you get here, I'll give you two tickets to the gun show, and see if you like the goods.

Me: I'm going to punch you in the ovary. 

Husband:  60% of the time, all of the time.

Me: OMG. Please stop talking before I change my mind.

Husband:  Agree to disagree?

Me: You're a smelly pirate hooker.

Husband:  Poop mouth!  Poop in your mouth!

Me:  Oh, you are going right to bed.

Husband: Take me to pleasure town?

Me:  OMG.  Get in the car. 


  1. Afternoon delight! I only watched this two weeks ago, but I'm feeling like I need to watch it again very soon.

  2. Hahahahahahaha Holy Crap I'm laughing so hard! We LOVE that movie! And now, Birdie and I are sitting her shooting quotes at each other! I've got to go---we're going to watch it now. It's like the 143 time! LOL

  3. I've never been more proud to know the two of you in my entire life.