There's really only one thing about fall that I can't stand. The fucking fall fundraisers. Or, as I like to refer to them, the FFF.
Fine, I don't refer to them as the FFF, but they are so annoying! Maybe it's just me. But really? Come on, they have a whole assembly to show all of the kids the super cool awesome prizes they can win if they sell only 299 rolls of wrapping paper! So then I have to break the news to my kid that she won't be selling 299 rolls of wrapping paper, because who buys wrapping paper for $4.99 a roll?! And, and you guys? You know that $4.99 roll of wrapping paper that you just bought? Well, it wraps about 3 presents!! Seriously, have you ever seen what it looks like under my tree on Christmas morning? $4.99 rolls of wrapping paper are not going to cut it here.
Sometimes, I try the old sneak and toss method, where I just sneakily toss the whole fundraising packet, and if the kids remember about it before it needs to be turned in, I claim ignorance. Sometimes you just have to do that.
You know, I get fundraisers. I understand why they do them. I just don't like them. I think, you know, I pay my school taxes. And I pay a lot! Why can't that be enough? They should make it really clear that the fundraisers are optional. Because you know what ends up happening every damn time?? I feel guilty and buy the cute checkbook cover, the huge tub of cookie dough, a roll of effing $4.99 wrapping paper and a key chain, spending approximately $89.00 on junk that I will never use (except the huge tub of cookie dough. who am I kidding. mmm), all so my kid can get a crappy plastic necklace prize that will break way before she loses it. Like in ten minutes. So, in other words, I just spent $89 on a cheap plastic kid's necklace.
Huh? I don't even spend $89 on a necklace for myself! Well. Except that one time when I bought myself that fantastic necklace from Tiffany's by accident. But whatever! You know what I mean!
Here's the kicker, which is maybe why I get so annoyed by fundraisers in general. I have 3 kids in school. I get those packets from each kid twice a year (minimum!). That means I have to deal with that crap SIX TIMES a school year. And that's only the school fundraiser! Last week I got two dance class fundraisers and a soccer fundraiser! My Cod. I cant even keep up anymore!
Anyway, that's my rant for the day. Sorry. I'll move on now.