converZations

Five minute brain purge:

I've been rather introspective lately.  More so than usual I guess.

My mind is often racing and I find it hard to fall asleep.  I'm always thinking thinking thinking.  My brain is all over the place.  And I can't exactly put into words what it is, what exactly it is that I am thinking about.

It's weird.  I'm forty years old, so I pretty much know myself.  I'd say that I've had enough time to get used to me.  My random thoughts, my vivid imagination, my irrational worries, my erratic dreams.  I have found myself surprised though, lately.

Moments that are amazing, puzzling, exciting, tense, funny... I'm not really used to that.  I am more used to relaxed, consistent, straightforward, calm, entertaining.  I waiver on which I believe is better, for me.

Maybe it's just little things I pick up on, in conversation.  A little something here, or a little something there.  Moments that somehow clarify all of these colliding fragmented thoughts.  Moments that somehow make all of these colliding fragmented thoughts crystal clear.  

I don't even know where I am going with this, this is odd, mysterious post.  Just following the words in my brain I guess.

Five minutes.  Time's up.