Monday, January 25, 2016

a couple of weird craigslist ads

Craigslist is so weird.  I'm scared to use it, actually.  It's too personal - usually when a transaction takes place, it's face to face, and I just don't like that.  But if you scan the ads, you'll definitely find that some goofy weirdo has posted something hilarious.  I appreciate hilarious, so I'm sharing because I am nice.  My brief and personal comments are in red.

Craigslist Ad #248: Stripper Pole (Waco)

FREE!!! I have a stripper pole that i no longer need. She broke her leg and is retiring.
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 1358449695

--ok, ew.  Sometimes I seriously wonder if these things are legit.


One free butt-pumpkin. Do you want an old pumpkin that looks like a butt. Pick it up in the alley behind Inn-Joy/Small Bar/Thai Village. First come, first who gets butt pumpkin. You can hold it up to your butt in pictures and it looks like you have a pumpkin for a butt. Due to the high demand, we will no longer be taking calls. Thank you.
  • Location: Wicker Park
--not quite sure about the butt pumpkin, but I was once given a carrot from the garden that looked like a guy with spiked hair.

Can we borrow your dog? – mw4mw

Hi So

We bought some bacon and some coffee this morning but due to being drunk we seem to have misplaced it.

We are 90-93% sure it's in our house somewhere. But where? We seriously have no idea. It's driving us nuts. We just want to drink some coffee and eat some freaking bacon. If you have a dog that likes smelling and finding bacon we would love to have him over. We will even feed you bacon once it's found. PleAse help

EDIT: it was in our couch. this took several hours and moments of hard thought. We still love dogs and welcome you and yours.

-- these drunken posts make me laugh and remind me of college

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