1. The term making love. OMG ew. I even feel cheesy writing it. I will never say that. Especially never when I am in the moment. Ever. And please never, ever tell me that you want to ML with me or I most definitely will gag and almost throw up or laugh in your face. Both of which would probably ruin the mood.
2. The V word. As in v*gina. OK, I cannot even actually type that without cringing. If I ever have to absolutely without a doubt say it (like in the presence of a real doctor or something), I will. But I wont like it. And I will definitely mumble it like va-hmhm all low talker-like. It's a very weird word to me. The word just refuses to come out of my mouth with ease. I grew up saying front hiney. As opposed to back hiney (thanks mom). Top that!
3. The word breasts. Ugh, again with the female anatomy. I blame my mother. I couldn't even call a chicken breast a chicken breast until I was a real grown up without wanting to laugh. I just picture Steve Martin saying breast in a funny breathy voice.
4. The word moist. Uh, gross. I feel kind of dirty now. My stomach may have just done a little flip flop with that one. I recently googled the synonym for moist because I really needed to use the word and ugh, I felt so skeevy saying it. Guess what the ONLY synonym for moist is? Dampish. Dampish? Really? Well, that sucks. I can't say, "This is some really dampish cake!" That just sounds ridiculous, doesn't it?
OK, so now that I am actually reviewing this mini list, I'm seeing a little trend and the words may seem to be related to sex and/or body parts. I mean, I really don't have a problem with sex or body parts at all. I feel like I have to say that I don't have a problem saying penis. Well. I mean it's not like I walk around saying penis left and right and finding interesting places to insert it into conversation or anything. But I have no trouble saying it as needed. I don't cringe inwardly about the word penis. In fact, I just said it 3 times in one paragraph! Penis. That makes four. I had to say it once more for good measure. Sorry. I got carried away by penis. (five)
OK, clearly it's about time to wrap up this post. What words/terms are really hard for you to say?
Making love makes me want to vomit. I do love Vagina, however.
ReplyDeletemother. i am 100% your daughter..because I can't say anyyy of those words either. Including penith. Yep, I typed with a lisp so I didn't have to type the real word. thanks for passing on the 'crazy,'love you.
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