Sunday, September 13, 2009

the perils of googling oneself


My married name is a fairly unique one, so when I googled myself, I didn't expect to come up with much. I like to consider myself a "writer," and I've had a few articles/snippets published here and there over the years, so I assumed maybe they would show up.


I was surprised to see that I have a few much younger namesakes out there... my name popped up with a myspace profile, some pretty unusual photos, as the lead in a school play and even as a high school softball player. That wasn't so bad, but to my complete and utter horror -- there was a poem published with my name as the author.
The poem was titled "Prisoner of Love." It was definitely not mine.


I've been a writer for as far back as I can remember, and I've written some pretty embarrassing poems in my day (not insinuating that this person's poem is embarrassing), but I would NEVER be comfprtable enough to publish them on the web. Maybe a tiny handful of the poems I have written are worthy of another's eyes, so I was horrified to think that this poem was out there, with people critiquing it, and maybe thinking that I HAD WRITTEN IT.

In general, I am pretty sensitive to criticism. I can handle it, but it affects me inwardly for sure. The thought that someone out there who could google my name for some reason, (narcissistic much?? lol) the thought that someone might look at that and think those were my thoughts and words is driving me crazy!! How can I make it known that I didn't write that poem??! I guess this post may help with that, but I can't make it go away can I???

All I am saying is that I wouldn't attach my name to something out there unless it was what I consider to be amazing. While I wouldn't be mean and critical of what someone else wrote, I can say that this particular poem isn't necesarily something I want to attach my name to. If I have any interest in writing on another level, publishing some articles and maybe even getting that book I'm writing finished -- this poem shouldn't be out there with my name on it. UGH.

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