tuna standoff update, burglars and pants in public

So last week I posted about An Epic Tuna Standoff, and I am happy to report that a mere 14 days into the standoff, the disgusting tuna container thing was miraculously removed from the back porch and cleaned.

At this point, we haven't spoken of it. For all I know, a burglar could have come in and cleaned that gross thing. Except that would be such a great burglar, wouldn't it? A burglar who comes and cleans, and maybe just like, steals something little. I'd invite him over to vacuum the family room if he was into it.

Why did I assume the burglar was a guy?  If you were my niece you might think that was very sexist of me.  Welp. I guess it was. I cant help but assume a burglar is a guy. Bad guys are guys, usually. Right?

On a similar note, isn't burglar a great word?  I don't think too many people use it anymore, and that is a damn shame. I never hear anyone say that they were burgled. Could be that there is less burgling happening these days, but who knows. I'm going to try to say burglar a lot more often.

I'd like to point out that I said burglar or some form of burglar at least 47 times in just a few paragraphs.

Fine, 47 was a slight exaggeration, but I think I was pretty close.

So, it's Tuesday.  WooHOO! Not sure why that is exciting, but I'm sure it is for some people. I have been lazy on my comfy office couch, reading, making vacation plans, drinking coffee, that kind of stuff. I have avoided any real, job/type obligations, such as laundry, dishes, eating, showering, vacuuming... I just haven't gotten around to it with all of the fabulous laziness. I suppose I should get my ass in gear because there is really only about an hour of peaceful quiet left in my day. Then, I have to be on, ready to answer questions and chat and feed small people.

Speaking of feeding small people, if I don't run to the grocery store, I will have nothing to feed people with, because the cupboards are pretty bare. Hey, I sounded like Old Mother Hubbard right there... which unfortunately isn't all that much of a stretch.

So anyway, I'm off. I will brush my hair and put on pants to look presentable at the grocery store, but only because it's more acceptable to wear pants in public. But that's IT, and I won't like it! And as soon as I get home I will put my comfy clothes back on and resume my position. In case you were wondering. :)

A tuna standoff of epic proportions

This is a story of a slight power struggle regarding tuna.

I have a weak constitution. I hate smelly smells - they make me gag. This is not new news. Personally, I would never make tuna fish and then turn it into a leftover.  Because really, who does that??  Does anyone EVER eat the rest of the tuna after it has been sitting there in the fridge for a few days?  No!  Nobody does!  Because that would be gross! And potentially vomit inducing. And besides, is that small plop of extra tuna going to make or break your sandwich anyway??

So apparently, my husband thinks leftover tuna is a good idea.

I

If I open the leftover container thing, the smell will 100 % make me throw up, so being the kind wife that I am, I left the tuna on the side of the sink for my husband to discretely clean out at his leisure. That happened approximately eight LEISURE FILLED days ago, but who's counting? At this point, the leftover tuna has gone from the fridge (still looking kind of appetizing), to the kitchen counter (wouldn't eat it with a ten foot pole), to the back porch (disgusting and moldy and drippy, ugh). Which is where it patiently waits for (insert air quotes here) "someone" to dispose of it. I think we all know who "someone" is. We are currently encroaching on day 9 of the counter to porch move.

I'd say it is safe to assume we have reached a tuna standoff of epic proportions. It reminds me of a goldfish cracker standoff that lasted an embarrassing amount of time. As you would assume, there was ONE lone goldfish on the floor for weeks. WEEKS! I'm sadly not even kidding. It became a thing to me, to see how long it would take for someone to bend down and pick it up without me asking - I mean, it wasn't off the beaten path or anything, it was right in our normal living space! There are five people in this freaking place!    

Any betters out there who care to make a wager on how long the disgusting tuna will remain on the porch?